Tuesday: Hili dialogue

March 19, 2024 • 6:45 am

Welcome to the Cruelest Day: a Tuesday, and it’s March 19, 2024: the first day of Spring! (Well, the first night of Spring: the vernal equinox occurs tonight at 11 pm Eastern time).

Foodwise, it’s National Oatmeal Cookie Day, a cookie tolerable only if it’s full of stuff like raisins or chocolate chips. Truth be told, I’d rather have a plain cookie.  Here’s an oatmeal with added orange zest and chocolate chips. But I’d much rather tuck into a cylinder of McVitie’s Dark Chocolate Digestive Biscuits.

Paul Martin, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

There’s a Google Doodle today celebrating Nowruz, the Iranian New Year (click on screenshot) for more information. Note that there’s a cat, but I can’t find a connection between the celebration and cats, although the artist’s explanation involves invoking “animal friends” as a sign of joy.

It’s also Certified Nurses Day, Proposal Day, National Chocolate Caramel Day, World Storytelling Day (I’ll tell a short one, a joke, below), Great American Meatout, National Poultry Day, National Agriculture Day, and Minna Canth‘s Birthday and the Day of Equality in Finland (Canth, a Finnish social activist, was born on this day in 1844).

Here’s my story, which is not mine. It’s really a long joke:

Two guys were sitting in a bar talking.  One guy was name Joe Black, and the other guy was Fred.  As they were talking, people kept coming in and going out of the bar. Everyonewho walked past said “Hi” to Joe Black.

Fred finally said. “WOW, Joe—you really know a lot of people”.  To this Joe replied,  “I do indeed. In fact, I knoweveryone in the world“.

At this Fred laughed.  “No, really!” said Joe, “I reallydoknow everyone in the whole world.”  They argued quite a while about this until Fred said, “I’ll bet $1,000 that you don’t know the Mayor.”

Joe warned Fred that he did know the Mayor and that Fred was sure to lose his money.  Fred took the bet anyway.  So on to the Mayor’s office they went. Upon entering, they were greeted by the secretary with, “Hi, Joe, how ya doing today?”  Joe said, “Great, I need to see the Mayor”.  To make a long long story a little shorter, the Mayor knew Joe very well.

Fred was a little upset about this and asked Joe if he could go double or nothing on whether Joe knew the President of the United States.  Joe warned Fred again that he was going to lose his money, but if he was  willing to pay for the two to travel to Washington, D.C., he’d gladly take  the bet. As it turned out, the President knew  Joe very well and invited the two to stay for dinner.

After this Fred was really pissed off.  He said, “Joe, I’ll bet you $100,000 that you don’t know the Pope.” (Fred was a rich guy).  Joe tried to talk Fred out of the bet, again telling him he would lose his money, but Fred insisted.  So off to Rome they went.

When they got to the Vatican, Joe told Fred that not just anybody could get inside to see the Pope. He gave Fred a pair of binoculars and told  him to climb up a hill behind the Vatican and watch for him and the Pope to come out in the yard and wave to Fred.  Fred was a little wary at first, but finally agreed.

Fred  waited onthe deserted hill in the hot sun for over an hour. Just when he was about to leave, he saw two people coming out the Vatican door.  The two walked  to the middle of the yard and started waving up at the hill.

Fred wasn’t sure what the Pope really looked like, and, since he had a lot of money riding on this, he wanted to make sure that it really was the Pope, “But how?”, he wondred.  Just then a dusty-looking old peasant man walked by. Fred figured that a local should know what the Pope looked like, and called him over. Fred gave him the binoculars and asked him who that was waving below.

To this the peasant replied “I’m not sure who the guy in the robe is, but that other guy is Joe Black!”

I’ll be here all year, folks. Add your joke below.

Readers are welcome to mark notable events, births, or deaths on this day by consulting the March 19 Wikipedia page.

Da Nooz:

Linda Thomas-Greenfield, the U.S. ambassador to the U.N., has weighed in with some whataboutery, but very good whataboutery: “The unforgivable silence on Sudan.”

Today, civil war has once again turned Sudan into a living hell. But even after aid groups designated the country’s humanitarian crisis to be among the world’s worst, little attention or help has gone to the Sudanese people.

For almost a year, I have been pushing the United Nations Security Council to speak out. On March 8, the Council finally called for an immediate cessation of hostilities. This is a positive step, but it is not nearly enough — and it does not change the fact that the international community and media outlets have been largely quiet.

The world’s silence and inaction need to end, and end now.

The first thing that must happen is we must send a surge of humanitarian support to Sudan’s most vulnerable. Eighteen million Sudanese face acute hunger, and famine is looming. Nearly eight million people have been forced from their homes in what has become the world’s largest internal displacement crisis. Measles, cholera and other preventable diseases have spread.

Since the start of this conflict, humanitarian workers have been on the ground, often putting their lives at risk to save others, but combatants on both sides of the war have deliberately undermined their efforts. The Sudanese Armed Forces has impeded the major humanitarian aid crossing from Chad into Darfur, and members of the rival Rapid Support Forces are looting humanitarian warehouses.

Regional and global leaders must unequivocally and publicly demand that the warring parties respect international humanitarian law and facilitate humanitarian access. If the parties don’t listen, the Security Council must take swift action to ensure lifesaving aid is delivered and distributed. The Council should consider all tools at its disposal, including authorizing aid to move from Chad and South Sudan into Sudan, as the United Nations has done with cross-border aid into Syria. The United States is prepared to help lead this initiative.

We also believe that the United Nations should appoint a senior humanitarian official based outside Sudan to advocate humanitarian access, scale up relief efforts and mobilize international donors.

Yet another country crying for humanitarian aid, but what do you hear from the world and the UN? Very little. And the number of refugees is far greater than those in Israel and Gaza combined.  Why doesn’t the world pay attention?

*I can’t believe it: Trump is out of money! Well, at least he claims that he can’t come up with the dosh to secure a bond that will guarantee his paying the $454 million he owes in a civil settlement involving fraudulent reporting of his assets. From the WSJ:

Donald Trump’s lawyers on Monday said the former president has been unable to obtain a bond to guarantee payment of a $454 million civil-fraud judgment against him, despite trying to negotiate a deal with some of the largest suretors in the world.

In a filing to a New York appeals court, Trump said that the judgment, ordered by a state judge last month, was so large that suretors wouldn’t accept real estate as collateral and would require cash to guarantee the bond. A private company like the Trump Organization would need $1 billion in cash to obtain the bond and to continue to operate, an amount the company doesn’t have, the filing said.

“Defendants’ ongoing diligent efforts have proven that a bond in the judgment’s full amount is ‘a practical impossibility,’” Trump’s lawyers wrote.

The legal drama places Trump’s finances and his image as a successful business tycoon in peril less than eight months before voters will decide whether to elect him for a return trip to the White House.

Trump has asked a New York appellate court to waive the bond requirement while he appeals the judgment, arguing that paying now would cause him irreparable harm. If the court turns down his request and he is unable to obtain a bond, New York Attorney General Letitia James, who sued Trump in 2022, could begin enforcing the judgment at the beginning of next week. James, a Democrat, has said that if Trump can’t come up with the money, she will look to seize his assets.

Can you imagine? They could seize Trump Tower and then sell it, with the buyer renaming it (I hope).

*The U.S. has completely banned asbestos from our shores, but of course a lot of it remains, and where it does remain it’s a giant pain to remove it. Still, it has to go. Thousands still die from this compound, and I was good friends with one (he worked in a steel mill and had contact with the stuff).  It causes mesothelioma, which is nearly always fatal. (Steve Gould was one of the rare survivors.) If you don’t know what this mineral is, read about it here.

The Environmental Protection Agency on Monday finalized a ban on chrysotile asbestos, part of a family of toxic minerals linked to lung cancer and other illnesses that the agency estimates is responsible for about 40,000 U.S. deaths each year.

The federal ban comes more than 30 years after the EPA first tried to rid the nation of asbestos but was blocked by a federal judge. While the use of asbestos in manufacturing and construction has declined since, it remains a significant health threat.

“Folks, it’s been a long road. But with today’s ban, EPA is finally slamming the door on a chemical so dangerous that it has been banned in more than 50 countries,” said EPA Administrator Michael Regan.

The agency’s ban targets chrysotile asbestos, also known as “white asbestos,” the only one of the six forms of the mineral still being used in the United States. Resistant to heat and fire, the mineral is used by companies that make vehicle braking systems and sheet gaskets. Chemical manufacturers have also defended its continued use in making chlorine, which utilities use to purify drinking water, as well as in pharmaceuticals and pesticides.

Michal Freedhoff, who heads chemical safety and pollution prevention for the EPA, called the ban historic, saying it is the first time the nation’s updated chemical safety law has been used to outlaw a dangerous substance. That law, the Toxic Substances Control Act, was so weakened by the federal courts’ decision in 1991 allowing continued asbestos imports and use that “it was rendered almost powerless to protect the people who needed protecting the most,” Freedhoff said.

But, as I said, new use is banned but the stuff is still hanging around. When I moved into my lab, they had to removed all the asbestos around the ceiling pipes, and my lab was a no-go zone, wrapped in plastic, for a long time.

Although the use of asbestos has declined, in large part because of liability fears, construction workers, firefighters, paramedics and others who spend time in old buildings are still being exposed. Once building materials containing asbestos are demolished or otherwise disturbed, the mineral’s fibers can stick to skin and clothing, ultimately finding their way into people’s lungs. There is even a name, “asbestosis,” for a chronic lung disease caused by inhaling asbestos fibers.

*Yesterday afternoon Biden and Bibi had a chinwag on the phone, and of course the tensions between them are deepening. Netanyahu, for instance, has called U.S. criticism of Israel “deliberately false”:

Speaking in Israel to the leadership of AIPAC, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu insinuates that criticism from Washington over the conduct of the war on Hamas is “deliberately false,” and expressed for domestic political gain.

“The description [from Washington] is you have an outlier prime minister with some extreme fringe groups and that’s what’s driving the policy,” Netanyahu says. “False. I would say deliberately false. They know it’s false. But that falsehood is perpetrated and it’s wrong.”

Back to the CNN report (bolding is mine):

President Joe Biden spoke by phone Monday with Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, their first known interaction in more than a month as a rift deepens between the two men over the war in Gaza.

During the call, the White House said the leaders discussed two key areas where tension has emerged in the relationship, including the necessity of getting more humanitarian aid into Gaza and the pending Israeli operation in Rafah, where more than a million Palestinian civilians are sheltering.

In a statement afterward, Netanyahu said he told Biden that Israel was committed to achieving its goals in Gaza while also providing the necessary humanitarian aid to the enclave.

“We talked about the latest developments in the war, including Israel’s commitment to achieving all the goals of the war: the elimination of Hamas, the release of all our hostages, and the promise that Gaza will no longer pose a threat to Israel – while providing the necessary humanitarian aid that helps achieve these goals,” Netanyahu said, according to the Prime Minister’s Office readout.

. . .Netanyahu on Sunday forcefully pushed back on Schumer’s speech during an interview with CNN’s Dana Bash.

“It’s inappropriate to go to a sister democracy and try to replace the elected leadership there. That’s something that Israel, the Israeli public does on its own, and we’re not a banana republic,” Netanyahu said on “State of the Union.”

The Biden-Netanyahu relationship has devolved over the past several months as frustration inside the White House mounts over what American officials regard as Netanyahu’s rejection of US advice on the war in Gaza.

After speaking on a daily or weekly basis at the onset of the conflict, Biden and Netanyahu now speak far less frequently. Their last phone call before Monday was on February 15 – the longest gap in calls since the October 7 terror attacks that launched the current conflict.

It’s a pity, and I don’t think that the U.S. is being a good ally to Israel in interfering with its internal politics during a war.  But I also think that Netanyahu is hellbent on achieving the aims of the war that I’ve put in bold above. Biden is hellbent on being reelected.

And here’s a half-hour conversation between Netanyahu and John Spencer, an ex-military officer who’s an expert on urban warfare. I wanted to hear Spencer’s take on this battle.

*And some lighthearted news from the AP’s “oddities section”.  Aresenal had to buy black Chelsea socks when playing Chelsea, and then cover up the “Chelsea” logo. 

A top-of-the table English Women’s Soccer League game with a crowd of nearly 33,000 suffered a delayed kickoff on Friday because the teams had matching socks.

Arsenal turned up at Chelsea with the same-colored white socks, forcing referee Rebecca Welch to delay the start.

Arsenal Women ended up going into the Chelsea megastore at Stamford Bridge and buying black socks. They used tape to try and hide the Chelsea and Nike logos. Arsenal’s kit is made by adidas.

They started 30 minutes late.

“Clearly it’s a human error, a mistake, but it’s embarrassing,” former England international Karen Carney, who played for both clubs, told Sky Sports. ”This is a massive crowd, a massive game.

“It’s a simple thing, a kit, and we have got it wrong. People make mistakes but the game does not need this and it’s frustrating. It does not look good for the game.”

WSL leader Chelsea won 3-1.

Here’s a video about the debacle (you can see the tape over  the Nike “swoosh” on the black socks before you clock on the video):

Meanwhile in Dobrzyn, local pet cats are scent marking. As Malgorzata explains the dialogue, “In March cats (not strays but not ours) come ont0i our verandah and “mark territory”. The stench is very unpleasant so we close the door. Neither Hili nor Szaron like it because they want to have free access from the verandah to the garden and vice versa. ”

Szaron: What a strange idea—closing the door to the garden.
Hili: It’s necessary in March because strange cats are coming and leaving text messages.
In Polish:
Szaron: Dziwne pomysły z tym zamykaniem drzwi do ogrodu.
Hili: W marcu to konieczne, bo przychodzą obce korty i zostawiają SMS-y.

*******************

From Beth:

From The Dodo Pet.  What is wrong with the caption?

From Kristen:

From Masih. At least the UN is doing its job with respect to singling out the plight of Iranian women.

Titania has tweeted again. And yes, there are new woke names for some of the Underground lines in London (see here).

An article from the Scandinavian Journal of Psychology is at the link. Part of the conclusions:

Overall, the study sample rejected critical social justice propositions, with strong rejection from men. Women expressed more than twice as much support for the propositions (d = 1.20). In both studies, CSJAS was correlated with depression, anxiety, and (lack of) happiness, but not more so than being on the political left was. The critical social justice attitude scale was successfully constructed and validated. It had good reliability and model fit.

From Bryan: a dead easy way to tie a tie, but I don’t think it will produce my favorite knot, the double Windsor (my dad taught me to tie that one):

From Malcolm; guess the animal. I know what it is!

From the Auschwitz Memorial, a three-year-old gassed on arrival at the camp.

Two tweets from Matthew. First, peek-a-boo kitty:

This is a total waste of academic time!

50 thoughts on “Tuesday: Hili dialogue”

  1. Scientists reconstructing what Adam might have looked like? Based on what data? They don’t deserve the label “scientists.”

    Reply

  2. On this day:
    1284 – The Statute of Rhuddlan incorporates the Principality of Wales into England.

    1649 – The House of Commons of England passes an act abolishing the House of Lords, declaring it “useless and dangerous to the people of England”.

    1687 – Explorer Robert Cavelier de La Salle, searching for the mouth of the Mississippi River, is murdered by his own men.

    1824 – American explorer Benjamin Morrell departed Antarctica after a voyage later plagued by claims of fraud.

    1831 – First documented bank heist in U.S. history, when burglars stole $245,000 (1831 values) from the City Bank (now Citibank) on Wall Street. Most of the money was recovered.

    1863 – The SS Georgiana, said to have been the most powerful Confederate cruiser, is destroyed on her maiden voyage with a cargo of munitions, medicines, and merchandise then valued at over $1,000,000.

    1895 – Auguste and Louis Lumière record their first footage using their newly patented cinematograph.

    1900 – The British archeologist Sir Arthur John Evans begins excavating Knossos Palace, the centre of Cretan civilization.

    1918 – The US Congress establishes time zones and approves daylight saving time.

    1920 – The United States Senate rejects the Treaty of Versailles for the second time (the first time was on November 19, 1919).

    1932 – The Sydney Harbour Bridge is opened.

    1945 – World War II: Adolf Hitler issues his “Nero Decree” ordering all industries, military installations, shops, transportation facilities, and communications facilities in Germany to be destroyed. [The decree was deliberately disobeyed by Albert Speer, who persuaded several key military and political leaders to ignore it. Coincidentally, it was Speer’s birthday – he was born on this day in 1905.]

    1962 – The Algerian War of Independence ends.

    1965 – The wreck of the SS Georgiana, valued at over $50,000,000 and said to have been the most powerful Confederate cruiser, is discovered by teenage diver and pioneer underwater archaeologist E. Lee Spence, exactly 102 years after its destruction.

    1979 – The United States House of Representatives begins broadcasting its day-to-day business via the cable television network C-SPAN.

    1982 – Falklands War: Argentinian forces land on South Georgia Island, precipitating war with the United Kingdom.

    2003 – United States President George W. Bush addresses the nation, announcing the beginning of hostilities in the Coalition invasion of Iraq.

    2008 – GRB 080319B: A cosmic burst that is the farthest object visible to the naked eye is briefly observed.

    Births:
    1813 – David Livingstone, Scottish missionary and explorer (d. 1873).

    1821 – Richard Francis Burton, English soldier, geographer, and diplomat (d. 1890). [At one count, he spoke 29 languages. He published translations of One Thousand and One Nights (commonly called The Arabian Nights in English after early translations of Antoine Galland’s French version); the Kama Sutra; and The Perfumed Garden, the “Arab Kama Sutra”.]

    1844 – Minna Canth, Finnish journalist, playwright, and activist (d. 1897). [Today’s Woman of the Day, see next post below.]

    1848 – Wyatt Earp, American police officer (d. 1929).

    1865 – William Morton Wheeler, American entomologist, myrmecologist, and academic (d. 1937).

    1880 – Ernestine Rose, American librarian and advocate (d. 1961).

    1881 – Edith Nourse Rogers, American social worker and politician (d. 1960). [The first woman elected to Congress from Massachusetts, until 2012 she was the longest serving Congresswoman and was the longest serving female Representative until 2018. In her 35 years in the House of Representatives she was a powerful voice for veterans and sponsored legislation including the G.I. Bill and the bills that created the Women’s Army Auxiliary Corps (WAAC) and the Women’s Army Corps (WAC).]

    1893 – Gertrud Dorka, German archaeologist, prehistorian and museum director (died 1976).

    1900 – Frédéric Joliot-Curie, French physicist and academic, Nobel Prize laureate (d. 1958).

    1906 – Clara Breed, American librarian and activist (d. 1994).

    1906 – Adolf Eichmann, German SS officer (d. 1962).

    1921 – Tommy Cooper, British magician and prop comedian (d. 1984).

    1928 – Patrick McGoohan, Irish-American actor, director, producer, and screenwriter (d. 2009).

    1933 – Philip Roth, American novelist (d. 2018).

    1936 – Ursula Andress, Swiss model and actress.

    1937 – Clarence “Frogman” Henry, American singer-songwriter and pianist.

    1937 – Egon Krenz, German politician. [The last Communist leader of the German Democratic Republic (East Germany). He had only been in office a few weeks when the Berlin Wall fell and he was forced to resign.]

    1946 – Ruth Pointer, American musician. [Eldest and last surviving original member of the family vocal group the Pointer Sisters.]

    1947 – Glenn Close, American actress, singer, and producer.

    1952 – Harvey Weinstein, American film producer and sex offender.

    1955 – Bruce Willis, German-American actor and producer.

    I’m the one that’s got to die when it’s time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to. (Jimi Hendrix):
    1871 – Wilhelm Karl Ritter von Haidinger, Austrian mineralogist, geologist, and physicist (b. 1795).

    1914 – Giuseppe Mercalli, Italian priest, geologist, and volcanologist (b. 1850).

    1919 – Emma Bell Miles, American writer, poet, and artist of Appalachia (b. 1879).

    1942 – Clinton Hart Merriam, American zoologist, ornithologist, and entomologist (b. 1855).

    1950 – Edgar Rice Burroughs, American soldier and author (b. 1875).

    1950 – Norman Haworth, English chemist and academic, Nobel Prize laureate (b. 1883). [Received the 1937 Nobel Prize in Chemistry “for his investigations on carbohydrates and vitamin C”. The prize was shared with Swiss chemist Paul Karrer for his work on other vitamins.]

    1976 – Paul Kossoff, English guitarist and songwriter (b. 1950).

    1982 – Randy Rhoads, American guitarist, songwriter, and producer (b. 1956). [The victim of a stupid and unnecessary accident.]

    1996 – Virginia Henderson, American nurse, researcher, theorist and author (b. 1897).

    2000 – Joanne Weaver, American baseball player (b. 1935). [One of the most talented hitters in All-American Girls Professional Baseball League (AAGPBL) history, Joanne Weaver was the youngest of three sisters to play for the Fort Wayne Daisies in the final years of the league.]

    2005 – John DeLorean, American engineer and businessman, founded the DeLorean Motor Company (b. 1925).

    2008 – Arthur C. Clarke, English science fiction writer (b. 1917).

    2008 – Paul Scofield, English actor (b. 1922).

    2014 – Fred Phelps, American lawyer, pastor, and activist, founded the Westboro Baptist Church (b. 1929). [His granddaughter Megan Phelps-Roper presented the excellent podcast series The Witch Trials of JK Rowling last year.]

    2021 – Glynn Lunney, American engineer (b. 1936). [A flight director during the Gemini and Apollo programs, he was on duty during the Apollo 11 lunar ascent and the pivotal hours of the Apollo 13 crisis. Later, he served as manager of the Space Shuttle program.]

    Reply

    1. Woman of the Day:
      [Text from Wikipedia]

      Minna Canth (Finnish pronunciation: [minːɑ kɑnt]; born Ulrika Wilhelmina Johnson on this day in 1844, died 12 May 1897) was a Finnish writer and social activist. Canth began to write while managing her family draper’s shop and living as a widow raising seven children. Her work addresses issues of women’s rights, particularly in the context of a prevailing culture she considered antithetical to permitting expression and realization of women’s aspirations. The Worker’s Wife and The Pastor’s Family are her best known plays, but the play Anna Liisa is the most adapted to films and operas. In her time, she became a controversial figure, due to the asynchrony between her ideas and those of her time, and in part due to her strong advocacy for her point of view.

      Minna Canth was the first major Finnish-language playwright and prose writer after Aleksis Kivi, the national author of Finland, and the first Finnish-language newspaper woman. She was also the first woman to receive her own flag flying day in Finland, starting on 19 March 2007. It is also the day of social equality in Finland.

      Canth was born in Tampere to Gustaf Vilhelm Johnsson (1816–1877) and his wife Ulrika (1811–1893). Her father worked at James Finlayson’s textile factory, initially as a worker and later as a foreman. In 1853 her father was given charge of Finlayson’s textile shop in Kuopio and the entire family relocated there.

      Canth received an exceptionally thorough education for a working-class woman of her time. Even before moving to Kuopio she had attended school at Finlayson’s factory which was intended for the workers’ children. In Kuopio she continued to go to various girls’ schools and as a testament to her father’s success as a shopkeeper, she was even admitted into a school intended for upper class children. In 1863 she began her studies at the recently founded Jyväskylä Teacher Seminary, which was the first school in Finland to offer higher education for women.

      In 1865 she married her natural sciences teacher, Johan Ferdinand Canth (1835–1879), and had to drop out of the Seminary. Between 1866 and 1880 she gave birth to seven children; her husband died in 1879 shortly before the birth of the family’s seventh child.

      She began her writing career at the newspaper Keski-Suomi, where her husband worked as an editor. She wrote about women’s issues and advocated temperance. In 1876 the Canths were forced to leave the paper because Minna’s writings had roused some bad blood; they were, however, both employed by the competing Päijänne the following year. Minna published her first works of fiction on the pages of Päijänne: various short stories, which were compiled in her first book, Novelleja ja kertomuksia, in 1878. She published a total of ten plays, seven short stories, as well as newspaper articles and speeches.

      Canth died suddenly of a heart attack at the age of 53 on May 12, 1897 at her home in Kuopio.

      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minna_Canth

      Reply

  3. Certified Nurses Day – this celebrates and promotes national board certification for nurses. My wife was an RN, licensed by the state, and had some ongoing requirements to keep her license current. But then she studied and (successfully!) for this national certification well into her career. It prompted her to take additional continuing education and carry out broader clinical work to get and keep her national certification, noted by the appending of the letter “C” to her RN title as “RN – C”. There is also a national board certification for high school teachers with similar portfolio requirements. I came to really like these certifications as they required a significant ongoing education post-degree by individuals in these dynamic fields.

    Reply

    1. I have worked as a public school instructional assistant/substitute teacher for twenty years. I’ve subbed in every grade K-12., including several long-term assignments in Honors/AP science. (I’m a biology major.)

      I have skimmed over the NBCT website. It lists the actions/tasks teachers must take in order to receive this certification. There’s no mention of NBCT staff in-classroom observation. School principals and other school system staff conduct in-classroom evaluation/observation. Why is that not sufficient (or apparently not of sufficient cache or panache or status)?

      My perception, however subjective, is that this certification is a pain in the neck to obtain. Teachers are up to their eyeballs in busy-ness (Thoreau’s word) as it is. (I don’t see how they put up with the suffocating, bureaucratic requirements of the job.) I understand that this certification expires after ten years. Then I reasonably gather that it is to be done all over again. This may be wrong, or perhaps no longer so. If it’s true, is the teacher no longer national board certified? I doubt that the teacher feels that way. After all, is the teacher not ten more years experienced? As I’m able I’ll search http://www.nbpts.org/certification/components/ in more detail. If it is so, I think it should be more forthrightly and clearly stated. One shouldn’t have to sift the website fine print to find it out. (They might not want that all that easily found out. Try as they might, they likely don’t object to a teacher paying that fee 2-3 more times during a career. (Do the NBCT board of directors have to go through a similar process every ten years to maintain their positions on the board?)

      I also understand that teachers have to pay some significant amount of money to the NBCT organization to obtain this certification. Some school systems reimburse teachers; others don’t. Perhaps I’m neurotic, but I smell a money-making scam here.

      Beyond that, ought there be a similar certification for university professors? After all, all who teach surely can stand to improve their pedagogy, eh?

      (I know of a grandparent – not a college graduate – who sat down with a first grader grandchild one night a week for a minimum of four nights per week, who had the grandchild read to him one hour a night. By the end of the first grade year, the grandchild was reading at the seventh grade level, and was probably likely beyond that. It didn’t require any graduate/specialist degree in reading. It merely required a motivated parental figure and a motivated student.)Or is this merely the exception that proves the rule?)

      (As an aside: today I heard of a public school soccer coach requiring a player to run a lap for not paying attention to instruction. How is it that classroom instructors cannot get by with that?)

      (And not to seem gratuitously obstreperous, but, per the U.S. Constitution, it seems anyone can qualify to run for school board or county commission or Congress or POTUS without having to present a depth and breadth of experience and certifications and qualifications, including a college degree.)

      Reply

  5. Before I contribute my joke, I want to alert you (Jerry) to a possible problem with WEIT (not the *content* of the site, of course, but the website itself). Specifically, my computer often alerts me that WEIT is slowing down my computer because it is consuming so much memory/resources. It could of course just be a quirk with my computer. But if other people are also having this problem, it probably is a problem with the site itself.

    I did some googling, and learned that when WordPress sites such as WEIT are consuming excessive resources, the problem is usually traced to the simple need to update plug-ins.

    Anyway, here’s my joke (from Quillette):

    Two friends were standing by a pond, and one said to the other, “What will you pay me if I eat a live frog?” The other said, “$100.” His friend figured he could use the money, so he reached into the pond, grabbed a frog, and choked it down. The other friend paid but felt bad for losing so much money. “How much will you pay me if I eat a live frog?” he asked. His friend said, “$100.” And so the man reached into the pond, grabbed a frog, choked it down, and got his $100 back. Then they looked at each other and asked, “For what did I eat a frog?”

    And one more for good measure:

    A skeleton walks into a bar and says, “Hey, bartender, gimme a beer – and a mop.”

    Reply

  7. The raisin oatmeal cookie is the greatest as millennials and Gen Zs will bite into one only to be shocked and dismayed that they are eating raisins, not chocolate chips (there is significant raisin hate in the younger generations).

    While those London train names are not the greatest, that is not the hill I would fight wokeness from.

    Joke: a group of young friends at the bar on Friday night notice an old man seated at a table in the corner is served 3 pints of Guinness. He takes a sip from each glass in turn, until all 3 pints are finished.He pays his tab and leaves.

    This happens every Friday night for several weeks. Finally the young friends nominate one of their own to inquire about this strange ritual. The old man smiles at the younger and says, “My name is Tom, and I hail from the old green isle, Ireland itself, and many years ago when me and my two brothers prepared to go our separate ways in the world, we agreed that no matter where in the world we found ourselves, on Friday night we would find a pub and order 3 Guinness, the finest beer in the world, and take a sip from each pint whilst remembering our brothers, our families, and the great Irish people”.

    The young man smiled and thanked Tom, and for the next many weeks the friends would greet Tom with a wave and a smile, as he completed his weekly ritual. Then one Friday Tom arrive on queue, but only 2 beers arrived at his table. Knowing this meant that Tom had lost a dear brother, the friends arrived at his table and offered their sincerest condolences. Tom looked puzzled, but then he smiled and said “No, my brothers are as fit as a fiddle, or harp, if you catch my drift”. The friends smiled, but had to ask, why only 2 beers? Tom scowled and said “Tis my doctor, he says Tom, you got to quit drinking!!!”.

    Be sure to tip the waitress.

    Reply

    1. Oatmeal cookies made with butterscotch chips (“Oatmeal Scotchies”) are superior to all others. I cut down the sugar, add maple extract, cinnamon, and pecans, and keep them cold in the fridge.

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  8. “Bond mistrusted anyone who tied his tie with a Windsor knot. It showed too much vanity. It was often the mark of a cad“

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      1. From Russia with Love. And the four—in—hand is the correct knot. All the actors who inhabited the role used it.

        Suggesting Bond got haberdashery wrong is blasphemous. Although can you imagine him wearing cowboy boots? You cannot.

        Reply

        1. Ummm. . . now you are getting insulting. And of course actors wore the knot that was specified in the books–they had to get the book right!

          I would be VERY careful about dissing cowboy boots.

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          1. I meant no offense! Just a little fun badinage. But the Windsor knot is not a winner. Cowboy boots are acceptable if you can work a lasso.

      2. It’s several decades since I read it, but I seem to remember it’s from “From Russia with Love”.
        It refers to Donovan Grant (who also ordered red wine with fish!).

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          1. And the second movement from Beethoven’s seventh was a recurring motif, I believe.

  9. I read a version of this on the internet a while ago:

    Jesus and Moses were in heaven, and they were dead bored.

    ‘Hey Jesus, Why don’t you go down and perform one of your miracles?’

    ‘Good idea, Mo! Which one?’

    ‘Walk on water. That should teach them to treat you with respect.’

    So Jesus goes to a Californian beach and sets out on a boat. There are plenty of young atheists frolicking in the water — the ideal place for a spot of miracling.

    He screams ‘I’m Jesus. Watch me!’ and jumps feet first into the water and sinks right away. Wet and coughing up water, he clambers aboard and tries again. Same result. Exasperated, he looks up and yells at Moses, ‘What the hell is wrong? It worked perfectly in Galilee.’

    Moses laughs: ‘You have holes in your feet, you idiot!’

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  10. For a more formal exposition of the topic of knotting ties written by two physicists, I recommend “The 85 Ways to Tie a Tie. The Science and Aesthetics of Tie Knots” by Thomas Fink and Yong Mao (1999).

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  11. Then there’s the story of the twin weevils. The first was ambitious and lived a successful life. The second was lazy and accomplished nothing. Guess you would say he was the lesser of two weevils.

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    1. It’s a Jack Aubrey joke from the Patrick O’Brian novels.

      Two weevils crept from the crumbs. ‘You see those weevils, Stephen?’ said Jack solemnly.

      ‘I do.’

      ‘Which would you choose?’

      ‘There is not a scrap of difference. Arcades ambo. They are the same species of curculio, and there is nothing to choose between them.’

      ‘But suppose you had to choose?’

      Then I should choose the right-hand weevil; it has a perceptible advantage in both length and breadth.’

      ‘There I have you,’ cried Jack. ‘You are bit – you are completely dished. Don’t you know that in the Navy you must always choose the lesser of two weevils? Oh ha, ha, ha, ha!’

      And here it is as rendered by Master and Commander

      Reply

      1. I heard the weevil joke many years ago as a kid, in connection with boll weevils and I’m not even from the South, long before Patrick O’Brien put the words into Jack Aubrey’s mouth.

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  12. You’re right. That was a long joke! I’ve read that joke before—or at least some variant thereof—but it’s still funny.

    I do wish that Biden and Netanyahu would talk more regularly—even if only to reiterate their disagreements. Not talking allows the imagination to run wild without constraint; mutual demonization comes next. Not good.

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  15. – I say, I say, I say, my dog’s name is Locksmith.
    – Why do you call him Locksmith?
    – Because every time I kick him, he makes a bolt for the door!

    Reply

      1. I’m glad you spoke up. When I told it to my wife, I changed it to, “Every time he sees a squirrel, . . .”
        She still laughed, (especially since we had a dog that did exactly that.)

        Reply

    2. Definitely a binturong, aka bearcat, aka Arctictis binturong. Largest species of viverrid, very arboreal, lives in denser forests of SE Asia.

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  17. Thanks for all the jokes.

    Most “billionaires” don’t have liquid assets of a $billion$, so it’s no surprise he can’t come up with the dosh without liquidating assets. I don’t think Trump has ever been a billionaire anyway. He just likes to brag that he is.

    One of my good friend’s father died of asbestosis. He was a plumber. It’s always amazing seeing those old Life magazines with full page advertisements for asbestos and how great it was. I’m sure it is a great insulator, they just didn’t know it is also a deadly insulator.

    Not sure about the animal, but it looks to be a water inhabitant.

    I think the caption should read: The rooster used a condom.

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    1. One of my dear friends died of mesothelioma last year. She had never smoked, so presumably she could have been exposed to asbestos fibres at some stage. She was a wonderful musician, and taught all three of my daughters to sing. She is missed and mourned.

      I can remember my father constructing our garage from corrugated sheet asbestos in around 1958. I still have a mental image of him sawing the sheets up and drilling and bolting them together. The last time I passed by the house, probably 20 years ago, the garage was still there – maybe nobody has dared to try to demolish it! Anyway, my dad lived to 94, and didn’t die from asbestosis. Lucky, I guess..

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      1. Sorry to hear about your musician friend. Strange how someone who presumably wasn’t exposed to asbestos can die of a passing exposer somehow, and someone who absolutely was exposed lived to a ripe old age.

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  18. OK, another bar joke:

    A man walks into a bar and orders 2 shots of bourbon.
    He then gulps one down with his left hand and pours
    the other over his right hand. Then he orders two more
    and does the same thing again. He repeats this two more
    times. The exasperated bar tender finally comes over to clean
    up the mess and asks “What the hell are you doing buddy ?!!”
    The guy replies: “I’m trying to get my date drunk”

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  19. No, apparently New York wouldn’t sell any seized Trump real estate. If he wins the appeal, they would have to return it (or the value). “Ms James would likely not sell these assets until the appeals process is over, Mr Thomas said. This is because if she were to lose the appeal to Mr Trump, her office would have to pay him back after losing value on properties they sold quickly.” https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-68609685

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  20. If there is a writer who has affected me most, it’s Arthur C. Clarke (who died on this day). His novel, “The City and the Stars,” remains the source of my perspective on a variety of issues, including his description of a plausible society whose inhabitants are immortal, but whose population includes endless variation. (Memory editing is a key element, as well as an episodic “rebirth” after a limited “lifetime” in a kind of technological reincarnation.)

    The correspondence I still value most is one from Clarke in which he praised a logo I designed in the early 1980s. (I should exhume the correspondence and digitize it.) Here’s the logo after I more recently added a digital halo:
    https://x.com/Jon_Alexandr/status/1221197849494294528

    I once met Clarke at a science-fiction convention where I asked him if “The City and the Stars” might ever be made into a movie. It was unclear then, and it remains unclear now. Though cinema technology is now able to represent just about anything imaginable, I doubt his “brainy” novel will see the big screen soon. VR technology might just do it justice, at least visually.

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  21. If by a “plain cookie” you mean a sugar cookie, count me in! A well-baked sugar cookie — crisp around the edges but soft in the center — is the apotheosis of cookie.

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    1. You’re right you know. A plain sugar cookie baked just perfectly as you specify is an under-appreciated treat. Although 5 or 6 are even better.

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  22. From Wikipedia:

    “A yolkless egg is a small egg with no yolk, sometimes produced by a pullet that has only just started laying. These eggs are common and usually pose no harm.

    “The eggs can also be called fart eggs, cock eggs, fairy eggs, dwarf eggs, and witch eggs. The name wind eggs is also sometimes used . . . .”

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