Every sperm is sacred: satirical Texas anti-masturbation bill moves through legislature

April 10, 2017 • 1:00 pm

The “Men’s Right to Know” Act, a bill introduced in the Texas state legislature by Representative Jessica Farrar (a Democrat, naturally), has had its first reading in the Texas House. It’s a satirical bill that mocks the Texas legislature’s constant attempts to control the bodies of women. As The Independent reports,

Under section 173.010 of House Bill 4260, the Man’s Right to Know Act, Texas men would only be allowed to masturbate under supervision, inside approved health care and medical facilities.

Any “unregulated masturbatory emissions outside of a woman’s vagina, or created outside of a health or medical facility, will be charged a $100 civil penalty for each emission, and will be considered an act against an unborn child, and failing to preserve the sanctity of life.”

The bill, created by state representative Jessica Farrar of Houston, would also promote “fully abstinent sexual relations” and create a “Hospital Masturbatory Assistance Registry” to “provide fully-abstinent encouragement counselling, supervising physicians for masturbatory emissions, and storage for the semen.”

Allowing Texas men only “occasional” masturbatory emissions inside the approved facilities, the bill would insist that the resulting semen be “stored for the purposes of conception for a current or future wife.”

Although the bill stands ZERO chance of passing, or even getting to a vote, it’s a hilarious commentary on recent Texas legislation—the kind of ingroup humor one rarely sees in American politics except at the White House Correspondents’ Dinners. The article continues:

Her bill, Ms Farrar has claimed, “mirrors real Texas laws and health care restrictions faced by Texas women every legislative session.”

Emphasising the need for full male abstinence, it comes three months after Republican Tony Tinderhold proposed criminalising abortion in Texas, arguing it would make women “more personally responsible” about their sexual behaviour.

Ms Farrar’s bill also insists that any doctor providing a vasectomy or prescribing Viagra must first read a ‘Man’s Right to Know’ booklet with the patient.

This, Ms Farrar has said, is a response to current Texas law which obliges doctors to give women considering an abortion a “Women’s Right to Know” booklet.  Ms Farrar has criticised this as a “guilt mechanism” to get the woman to change her mind.

She has also criticised the Texas law requiring a woman to have a trans-vaginal ultrasound before she can have an abortion as an “invasive, medically unnecessary procedure [where] one of the state’s objectives is to guilt her into changing her mind.”

So her bill also insists: “An attending physician must administer a medically-unnecessary digital rectal exam and magnetic resonance imagining of the rectum before administering an elective vasectomy or colonoscopy procedure or prescribing Viagra.”

You can see the full bill here; I’ve taken a screenshot of the introducton (below):

 

Farrar: a Texas hero

h/t: Robert N.

 

Around Taumarunui: animals, including glowworms!

April 10, 2017 • 10:00 am

My visit to Taumaruni and fellow atheist “blogger” Heather Hastie ends tomorrow when I take a bus to Auckland, where I’ll stay for six days before flying home. Heather was kind enough to take me to several local areas of interest, and I’ll do two posts on the area.  Two days ago, we did a double header, going to the Otorohanga Kiwi House to see local animals, including of course kiwi, and then to the famous Waitomo Glowworm Caves in the eponymous town. There are glowworm caves and sites all over New Zealand, but Waitomo is the most famous one, and is but an hour away from Heather’s town of Taumaruni.

We made it to Otorohanga in time to see the feeding of kiwis and of the two sister species of parrot, kea and kaka. It was pretty easy to see the kiwi eating as the twilight in the facility (the birds are nocturnal) allowed good visibility. The birds seemed to prefer rooting around in the soil to eating the food in their dish. (Perhaps it’s just instinct.) I couldn’t photograph them because it was too dark, but here’s a bill of a stuffed North Island Brown Kiwi (Apteryx mantelli), showing a unique feature of this group. Do you know what it is? (Answer below).

Kiwis are, I’m told, the only birds in the world that have their nostrils at the very tip of the beak. That’s undoubtedly because they forage by thrusting that long beak into the soil to grub for worms and insects. Because that clogs the nostrils, there are also baffles in front of them to prevent too much clogging of the nasal openings, though I’m told the birds have to keep snorting to clear their beaks while foraging.

Here’s a little brown kiwi photo taken from Birding New Zealand. The birds are endangered by introduced predators, and at this and other facilities kiwi chicks are reared from eggs taken from the wild and hatched in incubators (the wild parents breed again and the second egg is left in the wild). The success rate of kiwis becoming adults from eggs left in the wild is only 5%, while it’s 80% and up for eggs raised in captivity.

When the baby kiwis reach the “magic weight” of 1 kilogram, at which point they can defend themselves from all introduced predators save dogs, they are released back into the wild. The nickname for New Zealanders is, of course, “kiwis”, so they have a special interest in preserving these endangered birds (there are five species recognized).

We bought duck food at the entrance, so it was legal for me to feed this very rare and endangered bird, the Campbell Island Teal (Anas nesiotis). It is flightless.

Read the “Conservation” section of the link to show how this bird was saved.

I couldn’t get a good picture of the bird through the cage, so here are four of the teals from Wikipedia:

A bird we’ve seen before, the kākā, (Nestor meridionalis). They were fed a mixture of fruits and “nectar” (a sweet liquid). While I was photographing this one trying to pick the lock, it nipped me with its beak. It was only playing, though, and it didn’t hurt:

And the chick of a kea, my favorite New Zealand animal so far (I haven’t yet seen a kakapo, the flightless parrot). The two pictures of the chick below show the first kea chick hatched in captivity in 40 years.

An adult kea eating a piece of apple. These were fed fruits and vegetables.

A lovely New Zealand pigeon, or kererū (Hemiphaga novaeseelandiae), a fruit-eater and the only bird now capable of dispersing the seeds of the few New Zealand native trees that bear large fruit. It is a threatened species.

I forgot this bird and can’t be arsed to look it up, except that I remember it’s not a New Zealand endemic. I’ll let readers have the fun of identifying it:

My favorite endemic duck in New Zealand—the paradise shelduck (Tadorna variegata, Māori name pūtangitangi). The species has a striking sexual dimorphism. The next two pictures show a male and female; can you guess which is which?


Notice the odd feet of these ducks:

The white-headed bird is the female, and one wonders if there’s mutual or reverse sexual selection going on here (the birds appear to be socially monogamous, but there may be sneaky copulation or different mates in different seasons). The Paradise Shelduck is one bird that’s more common now than before European settlement, for they forage in pastures and have been bred for release on ponds to be hunted (oy!).

Another endemic, the lovely Variable Oystercatcher (Haematopus unicolor); Māori name torea-pango. The English name comes from the polymorphic frontal plumage, which ranges from mottled to all black (as in this one).

After a quick bite (a meat pie and iced mocha), we repaired to one of New Zealand’s great attractions, the Waitomo Glowworm Caves nearby. Here’s a bit from Wikipedia about how they were found:

The name “Waitomo” comes from the Māori words wai, water and tomo, hole or shaft. The local Māori people had known about the caves for quite some time before the local Māori Chief Tane Tinorau and an English surveyor, Fred Mace, did an extensive exploration in 1887. Their exploration was conducted with candlelight on a raft going into the cave where the stream goes underground (now the cave’s tourist exit.) As they began their journey, they came across the Glowworm Grotto and were amazed by the twinkling glow coming from the ceiling. As they travelled further into the cave by poling themselves towards an embankment, they were also astounded by the limestone formations. These formations surrounded them in all shapes and sizes.

They returned many times after and Chief Tane independently discovered the upper level entrance to the cave, which is now the current entrance. By 1889 Tane Tinorau and his wife Huti had opened the cave to visitors and were leading groups for a small fee. In 1906, after an escalation in vandalism, the administration of the cave was taken over by the government. In 1910 the Waitomo Caves Hotel was built to house the many visitors.

In 1989, the land and cave were returned to the descendants of Chief Tane Tinorau and Huti who comprise many of the employees of the caves today. The descendants receive a percentage of the cave’s revenue and are involved in its management and development.

Here’s the stream that flows into the cave entered by Mace and Chief Tane. Another 20 meters and they’d see the entrance:

The cave entrance where the discoverers found it; it’s lush outside but of course all vegetation immediately disappears when you enter. This is the exit when you take the tourist boat ride:

The two discoverers:

And a photo of how you had to tour the cave in 1920. There are now electric lights in the cave-y part with stalactites and stalagmites (and great acoustics; Dame Kiri Te Kanawa once sang there), but the bit with glowworms is left completely dark.

The cave entrance, where our Māori guide told us the rules: including no photos, even without flash. We were told that the no-photo rule was at the request of the “family” (the descendants of the discoverer and his extended family), but I’m not sure that was true. At any rate, I didn’t take any photos and so what I show of the cave interior comes from other photographers.

The tour consists of a slow walking tour of the cavern, and then you pile into aluminum boats, each holding about 25 people, for a slow trip down the river through the glowworm caverns. It takes place in complete darkness and silence, with the guide holding onto an overhead line to pull the boat silently upstream. On the cavern’s ceilings are, well, you’ll see in a second. . .

Part of the caverns; this (taken from Wikipedia) is called the “Great Cathedral” and has superb acoustics: our guide sang a Māori song to demonstrate this. He had a lovely voice, and I suspect they choose their guides partly based on the singing voice, as no tourist was willing to sing as a demonstration.

Me at the cave exit, where photos are allowed. I’m wearing a greenstone pendant I bought:

Now, the glowworms. The illumination is made by larvae of the glowworm fly Arachnocampa luminosa (titiwai in Mãori). They spend most of their lives as larvae and only live three days as adults. They have no mouthparts and cannot feed; their mission is simply to breed quickly and then die:

An adult glowworm fly just eclosed from its pupal case (from Spellbound New Zealand). Nearby are the long-lived larvae, each of which produces long silken threads, studded with globs of sticky goo, that hang down into the cave. These nets (more than 50 can be “owned” by a single larva) catch prey. To attract insects, the glowworms have bioluminescent abdomens.

What it looks like inside the cave (not my photos), presumably with the light coming from near the exit, but it may be from a flash:

The ceiling by the cave exit, studded with thousands of big, blue-green stars:

What it looks like when you look up–a biological equivalent of the night sky:

What the above would look like when illuminated from the side (we saw a few of these traps in the main cave):

A description from Wikipedia:

The larva spins a nest out of silk on the ceiling of the cave and then hangs down as many as 70 threads of silk (called snares) from around the nest, each up to 30 or 40 cm long and holding droplets of mucus. The larvae can only live in a place out of the wind, to stop their lines being tangled, hence caves, overhangs or deep rainforest. In some species, the droplets of mucus on the silk threads are poisonous, enhancing the trap’s ability to subdue prey quickly.

A larva’s glow attracts prey into its threads. The roof of a cave covered with larva can look remarkably like a blue starry sky at night. A hungry larva glows brighter than one that has just eaten. Prey include midges, mayflies, caddisflies, mosquitos, moths, and even small snails or millipedes. When a prey is caught by a snare, its larva pulls it up (at up to about 2 mm a second) and feeds on the prey. When Arachnocampa prey are scarce, larvae may show cannibalism, eating other larvae, pupae or adult flies.

The glow is the result of a chemical reaction that involves luciferin, the substrate; luciferase, the enzyme that acts upon luciferin; adenosine triphosphate, the energy molecule; and oxygen. It occurs in modified excretory organs known as Malpighian tubules in the abdomen.

Here’s a very informative PBS video of the system, which shows the selective advantage of the lights produced by the larvae. It’s mind-boggling to ponder how this would have evolved in an adaptive, stepwise fashion; I have ideas but won’t bore you with them here.

And a time-lapse video; YouTube’s description:

A Time-lapse of New Zealand’s Glowworm caves as they have never been seen before. Filming this involved sleeping in caves for multiple days in complete darkness with just the sounds of the cave to keep us company (and the occasional eel). Read the full story of how we pulled this off on our blog.

UPDATE: This video won New Zealand Geographic’s 2015 Photographer of the Year award in the Time-lapse category

Many thanks to Heather for taking me to these sites. More photos of the area to come!

Spot the tiger!

April 10, 2017 • 8:00 am

This picture has a TIGER in it, and reader Michelle Pearce gives this information:

The picture was taken in Ranthambore Reserve: according to my Google locator, at Kacheeda Kalan, Rajasthan, India, on March 28, 2017.

Can you see it? I don’t think it’s too hard, but it’s our first tiger. Reveal at noon Chicago time.

Monday: Hili dialogue & Leon monologue

April 10, 2017 • 6:30 am

by Grania

On this day in 837, Halley’s Comet made its closest approach to earth  at a distance of 5.1 million kilometres. Its earliest verifiable mention was 240 BC and it became famous in Europe in 1066 when it was interpreted as an omen before the Battle of Hastings.

Just as calamitous (for some) on this day in 1970 Paul McCartney announced he was leaving the Beatles. John Lennon had also announced his intention to leave some months earlier but had kept the news from going public as the album Abbey Road was about to be released.  Thus ended an era. So it goes.

In 1931 on this day philosopher, painter and poet Kahlil Gibran died. He is most famous for his book of poetry The Prophet which has been translated into 50 languages.

‘Some of you say, “Joy is greater than sorrow,” and others say, “Nay, sorrow is the greater.”
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.’

 

In Poland today Hili is puzzling out a great mystery.

Hili: The higher I climb the higher up they perch.
A: There may be some logic in it.

In Polish:

Hili: Im wyżej wchodzę, tym wyżej one siadają.
Ja: W tym może być jakaś logika.

And Leon’s staff are currently in the process of moving house.

Leon: Home is where my bowl is.

Talk and bird walk: Auckland and environs (and possible meetup)

April 10, 2017 • 12:41 am

I’m giving a science talk on April 13th at the Oteha Rohe campus of Massey University, hosted by Dr. Gayle Ferguson (who saved the life of Jerry Coyne the Cat) here’s the notice, and the public is welcome to come, but remember that it’s aimed at evolutionary biologists:

Also, there’s a trip the next day to the Tiritiri Matangi bird sanctuary on an island 30 km NE of Auckland, leaving at 9 or 9:50 am on the 14th, depending on where you get the ferry (see below). Anybody is welcome to come, and you can read about the island and sanctuary on Wikipedia as well.

This is the info that Gayle sent:

The Tiritiri trip is not a field trip, and all are welcome. As many people can go as there are spaces available on the ferry.  If people want to come, all they need to do is go to the website and buy a ferry ticket (with the guided tour included).  There is only one ferry per day.

The ferry leaves Auckland harbour at 9am and picks up more passengers at Gulf Harbour (where we will get on) at 9.50am.  The ferry leaves Tiri at 3.30pm, arriving Gulf Harbour at 3.50pm and Auckland Harbour at 4.45pm.   Prices (including guided walk – highly recommended!) are $80 from City and $65 from Gulf Harbour.  Website: https://www.fullers.co.nz/timetables-plus-fares/

It’s been suggested to have a meetup at an inexpensive central restaurant in Auckland on either Friday or Saturday (the 14th or 15th). If you have any interest in this and would be serious about attending, please respond in the comment section below and then watch this site for any announcements.

Ten fun facts about New Zealand for Americans

April 9, 2017 • 2:40 pm

Kia ora!

It’s hard to believe I have only a week left in New Zealand out of the month allotted. I’ve had a GREAT time so far. It’s a gorgeous land, and everyone has been super friendly and hospitable—save the woman who runs Noah’s Ark Backpackers in Greymouth, who was rude and didn’t seem to like Americans.

I’d recommend a visit to New Zealand highly, and it has special interest for biologists because of its plethora of weird plants and animals that evolved largely in isolation, though, like the government and residents, I worry about the disappearance of flora and fauna because of introduced species. I worry, too, that the country will get too popular, for part of the charm of this land is its large expanse of forest and uninhabited land. The population of the entire country is just 4.5 million—half that of New York City alone.

New Zealand wants and deserves more tourism, but I hope it doesn’t get overrun. Even the “tourist towns” aren’t that touristy, and have the special New Zealand aura of America’s Wild West, with their small shops and shopfronts overhanging the sidewalks.

Anyway, at my instigation, Heather Hastie helped me compile a list of “Ten Fun Facts about New Zealand”.  If you think they’re erroneous, take them up with her (#1 is mine)!

1).  New Zealand restrooms (always called “toilets” here), whether they be in a public park or a bar, are spotlessly clean. This is a great pleasure to an American, particularly one who’s spent a lot of time in India. New Zealand is a very clean country!

2). A popular phrase here, which I’ve heard a few times, is “sweet as“, which is the Kiwi equivalent of “She’ll be right” [“Everything’s great”] used in Australia.

3). I’ve seen this in Taumaranui, but Heather tells me that it’s common in small towns in New Zealand and even in the outskirts of larger towns: people will go out shopping barefoot.  Heather adds that if you go out in the morning you’ll sometimes see people wearing their pajamas while shopping.

4). During the spring and summer in the Southern Hemisphere, New Zealand is first country to see the Sun on a given date: it’s the land closest to the west of the International Date Line line. The first town to see the sun is Gisborne, where Heather was brought up. During the fall and winter here, though, Samoa (and its town Apia) is the first to see sunrise. (Samoa moved across the International Dateline in 2011.)

5). In 1893, New Zealand became the world’s first country to give women the right to vote. In that same year, Elizabeth Yates also became the first woman to be mayor of any city in the British Commonwealth: Onehunga.

6). From 1999-2016, New Zealand had prime ministers who were atheists: Labour PM Helen Clark and National Party PM John Key. One thing an American notices immediately about New Zealand is its refreshing lack of the religiosity that permeates our country.

7).  New Zealand is the only country in world to have had a transgender member of parliament, Georgina Beyer. Born George Bertrand, Beyer was a teenage prostitute in Wellington, and then, after transitioning, became the world’s first openly transgender mayor—of the town of Carterton.

8).  Although the Australian and New Zealand accents sound similar to me, Heather says they’re not. A diagnostic word is that for the numeral “6”, which, she says, is pronounced (to my ear) like “sex” (or “secks”) in Australia and a cross between “sucks” and “six” in New Zealand.

Also, I’m told Aussies put “y”s on the ends of words while Kiwis do not. An Aussie may, for instance, say “I’m putting on a cardy [cardigan] to take the doggy for a walky,” while a Kiwi would say, “I’m putting on a cardigan to take the dog for a walk.”

Both Aussies and Kiwis say “mate,” but Aussies also use the word “matey,” which is much rarer in New Zealand.

In social settings, Aussies will often abbreviate your name automatically, even if you don’t like it. “Jerry,” for instance, would become “Jer” (sometimes “Jezzer”!) in Australia, and “Judith”—the name of Heather’s mom—would become “Joo.” Kiwis don’t do that except for very close friends and family members. In Australia, Lawrence Krauss would become “Larry,” a usage he doesn’t like at all.

9). The world’s steepest residential street is Baldwin Street in Dunedin, New Zealand, with a 35% grade at the top. Wikipedia says this:

The 161.2 metres (529 ft) long top section climbs 47.2 metres (155 ft) vertically, an average gradient of 1:3.41. At its maximum, about 70 metres (230 ft) below the top, the slope of Baldwin Street is about 1:2.86 (19° or 35%). That is, for every 2.86 metres travelled horizontally, the elevation changes by 1 metre.

Some photos:

And a tilted picture to show the gradient:

10).  I asked Heather what the Kiwi stereotype of Americans is. After some prodding, she reluctantly divulged that it is this: “Fat, loud, and thinking they’re more important than other people because they are Americans.” But of course that’s a stereotype, and I haven’t found any anti-American sentiment in this country (except for the woman in Greymouth). That also happens to be the stereotype of Americans in European countries like France.

BuzzFeed has its own 69 fun facts about New Zealand, but I didn’t look at it before I wrote this.

Come visit! And if you’re a Kiwi, add your own fun fact.

Kea Ora