It’s time to start thinking about those worthies who deserve a little something for the holidays. How about an e-meter? Or a leather-bound collection of L. Ron Hubbard’s works? Yes, if you have some spare change (a lot of spare change!), you’ll find all that and more at the interactive Dianetics and Scientology 2014 Holiday Catalogue.

For only $5,000, for instance, you can get this:

Now that’s a classy way to audit!

If you can’t afford that, you can get study tapes and books for $175 and up. And for only $675 ($750 Canadian), you can get a 16-volume set all about L. Ron Hubbard:

And finally, if you’re feeling really flush, here’s a leatherbound, gilded, tooled, and marbled-paper copy of L. Ron Hubbard’s writings, so fancy that the price isn’t even quoted (it says “Contact the Planetary Dissemination Unit or your Publications Org for donations information”).  It must run thousands of dollars. Still, what is money compared to the pleasure this set would bring your loved ones?