I’ve written several times about the trio of “I-almost-died-but-went-to-Heaven-and-it’s-real” books, including the discredited Proof of Heaven by Eben Alexander, the discredited The Boy Who Came Back from Heaven by Kevin and Alex Malarkey (good names) and the not-yet-discredited Heaven is for Real, by Todd Burpo and Lynn Vincent, detailing Colton Burpo’s (Todd son’s) visit to Heaven (including an encounter with a Very Large Jesus) when he survived an emergency appendectomy at the age of four.
No way a four-year-old could make stuff up like that, could he?—especially since Colton gave post-visit details to his parents (like encountering his younger sibling, who died in a hushed-up miscarriage) that he could not have known unless they were imparted by God. No matter that Colton’s dad was an impecunious preacher. The book went to #1 on the New York Times best-seller list (in NONFICTION), as did, I think, Proof of Heaven. The success of “heaven tourism” books goes to show that if you want to rake in the dosh, write something that convinces the public that heaven is a real place, and they have a chance to live forever with God. So much for the Sophisticated Theologians™ who claim that such childish beliefs aren’t that common!
Heaven is for Real was also made into a movie last year with Greg Kinnear in the role of Todd. As expected, it got a notably low critics’ rating on Rotten Tomatoes, though the public liked it a lot more (of course!): the movie earned more than 100 million dollars. Such is the American appetite for real evidence of God and Christ.
Here’s the trailer:
The movie, and Fox News flack Sean Hannity’s credulous acceptance of it, is the subject of yesterday’s Sunday Secular Sermon by Jeffrey Tayler, “Sean Hannity, very bad critic: Fox News, Sarah Palin pal help hit movie prey on the gullible.” The title tells it all, as does the STRIDENT opening paragraph:
The religious and their cynical Hollywood panderers have offended reason and outraged aesthetics by generating a treacly tale of celestial sojourning so transparently trumped-up that only a fool could fail to see through it. Yet, in so doing, they have exposed the acute faith-derangement syndrome (FDS) afflicting large swaths of the American public and thus, potentially, cleared the way for sanity-inducing treatment.
While neurosurgeon Eben Alexander’s book was thoroughly discredited in Esquire by Luke Dittrich (thankfully the demolition job, once behind a paywall, is once again available gratis), the “proof” of such stuff wouldn’t convince the merest skeptic; it’s meant to serve satisfy the confirmation bias of those who already believe. As Tayler notes:
A slash or two of Occam’s razor judiciously applied to the Burpo “enigma” and all becomes wondrously clear. The most obvious (and charitable) assumption: Colton had a dream and recounts the dream, confusing it with reality, as any four-year-old might. Penniless Padre Burpo, sensing lucre, then takes what Colton tells him, contacts publishers and … you can supply the rest of the story. In any case, the Burpo clan and their associates hit the FDS jackpot. No surprise there: seven out of ten Americans still call themselves Christians, and they are known to donate oodles of their hard-earned income to God-peddlers of all stripes. Spending a mere fifteen dollars on a book seems like a low-cost way to “reconnect with their faith.”
As Tayler adds, such skepticism was shown by Sean Hannity in his interview with the movie’s director and Todd and Colton Burpo. Here’s that interview (trigger warning: severe delusions):
Note that Colton tells us that no matter how old or infirm we are, in Heaven we’ll have the bodies we had in our prime (or would have had in our prime, given Colton’s vision of his miscarried sister as a young woman.) Tayler doesn’t try to hide his disgust at the interview and at Hannity’s sickening credibility:
For affirmation, Hannity turns to Burpo père, who offers the jarringly untrue, self-serving observation that “when you have a four year-old, there’s no way that they have the capacity to take you on long journeys, and make up things, and you not to be able to know that they’re making it up.” He then blurbs the flick: “I think this movie will do great because you’re gonna see in this little boy on the screen pretty much what I saw eleven years ago.”
“Does everybody go to heaven?” Hannity asks Colton.
“No, not everybody does go to heaven.” Why? “Everybody there loved Jesus … once we love Jesus, it’s easier to let [material things] go, and we can enter heaven.”
Having expressed not an iota of skepticism, Hannity ends the interview.
The evangelicals who raised such a fuss about l’affaire Burpo were obviously right to do so. Now they would do well take a close look at their own beliefs. Faith-derangement syndrome is, after all, a folie à deux, and they suffer from it as well. But a little clear-headed adult thinking would cure it in no time.
As for “Heaven Is for Real,” nothing will redeem it.
Well, not to the skeptic, but ten million copies of the book and millions of dollars in profits for the Burpos have redeemed their own credibility.
The success of “heaven tourism” books goes to show that if you want to rake in the dosh, write something that convinces the public that heaven is a real place, and they have a chance to live forever with God.
“Religion always sells provided it is soppy enough.” — George Orwell, Keep the Aspidistra Flying
I nearly got sick listening to the interview. Just think what the movie will do.
The airlines have barf bags handy. See the film there.
Oh, so fetuses love Jesus. Got it. These folks really don’t think these things through at even the most obvious level:
Fetuses go to heaven. But if they are born, they lose they have to be a certain kind of repentant Christian to go to heaven, so they might not go to heaven if born. Which means that abortions are the only sure way to get your kids into heaven… 😮
Ah so when this kid had no money he nearly got to heaven, BUT now he’s made a fortune on the back of that he stands no chance of getting in next time. Interesting choice to publish in that case
If you want a more thoughtful take on NDEs I recommend Connie Willis’s ‘Passage’
http://www.salon.com/2001/05/21/willis_4/
Hannity has no credibility, sickening or otherwise.
Probably you meant “credulity”?
Yeah…oh how I loathe that pompous prig.
It was indicative when Hannity casually mentioned that he reads all books about near-death experiences.
I wonder what Kennewick Man would have thought of all this.
Maybe in 8000 more years some scientists will exhume this kids bones (after he really dies) only to have the Supreme Golf Ball Caste tell them to put his bones back so be can be one with the Mother Golf Ball.
Yes, the sacred MGB.
I suppose Colton does not believe that telling a lie is a sin, and that now he will go to hell.
Dostoyevsky should have said: Once you love Jesus, everything is permitted.
It’s annoying that these people claim near death experiences while they were under anesthesia, asshats, that’s called dreaming. I can tell you from personal experience what a near death experience is, it’s when you’re damn near dead, in pain and fully conscious. Looking up at a doctor in the emergency room when he says “uh oh”, that’s an NDE! I wish I had already been anesthetized.
As a child I had visions saw angels and got to stand in front of the church and tell the most wonderful stories.. I am not lying… not at least now – what this a-hole is doing to his child is sick and child abuse because what is going to happen is he will realize what has happend and what he and his father have done and he will look at all the good stuff he has and think.. I can keep doing this.. I can keep up this charade and get to talk at churches and get money and see the country and not have to really work…aw crap.. I wish I had kept going
Exactly. This father is using his son like a performing dog, and there’s a pretty good chance the son will work it all out at some point. This poor kid could have some pretty bad long-term effects from this.
It’d be interesting to hear more about your own experiences too.
It is jaw dropping, disorientating, to imagine the degree of credulity it would take to take what that boy was saying seriously.
And Christians complain when some atheist compare Heaven/Jesus belief with Santa.
Anyway, the boy says in heaven we will be “in our prime” e.g. late 20’s early 30’s.
What the hell could that possibly mean? First, what about all the people who never made it to their “prime” age and died younger? Second, what if you died at 80. If you are reconstituted as 30 years old, what about all the memories and experiences you formed when well past that age? Do they disappear?
But most of all, why the hell would a “prime aged body” MATTER in heaven? Aren’t we incorporeal spirits there? What GOOD is a body “at it’s prime” in the incorporeal realm? Why would it be necessary?
Or is it just for aesthetic value only, for something to look at? In which case, apparently God apparently perpetuates the very ageism and youth fetishism of today’s magazines and pop culture. Thanks a lot big guy. (And what a surprise that a boy’s vision of heaven would fall in line with current pop cultural aesthetic norms).
Once the kid started describing walking with Jesus I was begging Hannity through the screen to ask: “You saw the real Jesus? Finally you can settle this question: what ethnicity was Jesus? What skin color? Hair?”
It would have been fun to see the squirming involved in answering that 😉
I would rather be 40 again rather than 20 or 30. It is less likely that I would be an idiot in heaven.
Fox has already settled the colour question so Hannity didn’t need to ask: Jesus, along with Santa, is white.
Well, the Catholic Church remains the largest Christian denomination worldwide, and yes, they “infallibly teach” that there’s a bodily Resurrection. Not the type of thing the sophisticated theologians like to trot out, but it’s there. And I’d bet Catholics are far from the only ones who believe it.
Next time he goes to heaven, he should visit a tailor. That’s an awful shirt and tie combo.
The tale the boy told avoided the rough territory of relating what Jesus actually told him. Everything he reported was vague, general and, of course, unverifiable. When asked what Jesus told him, he said God fixed it so he wouldn’t remember his words. Now, if you want a fudge, that’s a good one. Without it the boy’s Jesus quotes would pretty much have to be included as a book of the bible wouldn’t it? I’m guessing that would have brought a little to much critical attention for this slimy trio.
Much as I enjoy Tayler’s writing, did anyone else struggle with the title? Jerry thought it was clear, but when I read this yesterday, I had to read it a heap of times to work it out. I wondered if it was just me.
Hadn’t noticed it till you mentioned it, but it is cumbersome to say the least. Sounds like someone wanted to get all the clickbait possible in that title.
Same here.
sub
Something I’ve wondered about since the first time I heard about one of these celestial travelogues: How do immaterial souls interact with the electromagnetic and gravitational forces?
The people who report these heavenly experiences invariably report back about what they’ve “seen” — usually starting with the sights in the operating or emergency room of a hospital or wherever else their body and soul first took leave of one another. (The accuracy of these initial sights is frequently cited by believers as evidence of the validity of the experiences.) However souls interact with the electromagnetic force, it seems conveniently coincidental that souls are sensitive to the same visible-light spectrum as human bodies with their material eyes, optic nerves, brains etc.
Similarly, how do incorporeal souls, which presumably have no mass, interact with the gravitational force? According to the reports of these experiences, souls have some type of self-initiated locomotion ability. Indeed, rather like Harrier jump jets, souls seem to be able either to hoover in the troposphere (again, usually beginning immediately after they separate from the body) or to zoom about at supersonic speeds, as needed. This ability of souls to move about in the material world would seem to call out for a plausible explanation by believers.
“would seem to call out for a plausible explanation by believers.”
Magic?
Yes.
Believers are stuck in the pre-scientific metaphysical mode of thought. Stuff like conservation laws doesn’t even register.
Cartoon physics, if you will. Just as Wiley E. Coyote stands in midair for an eternity, long enough to pull multiple placards from his nether-regions explicating his realization of his predicament, before gravity finally wakes up and snatches him to his not-actually-doom…ghosts can float through walls and they stub their toes on toys carelessly left on the floor and they can fly like Superman and they’re at peril for falling off cliffs.
Makes for great childish humor, especially if you’re still flirting with that whole permanence thing that makes “peek-a-boo” and “I got your nose!” so much fun. And nothing worng with adults indulging in it, too! The problems only start when the adults forget to come back to reality….
b&
Even Descarte had no answer to this known puzzle.
He tried though, with the pineal gland, and failed. As he had to, as there is no coherent answer.
Except as someone said, magic.
As usual, you’ve given a splendid and amusing explanation of the human condition.
I can only add, I think an aspect that often goes missing on this forum is the fact that so many of these unscientific, insufficiently nerdy fellow humans don’t really give a sh*t about any of this. Their lives are preoccupied with other things(what’s fer dinner?). Science is something they vaguely remember reading something about in high school so many decades ago.
Man, are they missing out on a serious goldmine of a franchise opportunity. If they had even the slightest clue, up next would be, “Valhalla is For Real,” to target the ever-elusive 18-35 demographic. And “The Elysian Fields are For Real,” for the romantics.
Of course, there should also be a parallel series: “Hell is For Real,” “Tartarus is For Real,” “Fox News is For Real”….
b&
All this “for real” is making me think of reality tv. Wait till next season.
I do hope that people are no more taken in by the “reality” of reality TV than they are by “professional” wrestling….
b&
The “Heaven Is Real” flick has grossed $100 mil? Goes to show, as H.L. Mencken observed, that it’s tough to go broke by underestimating the taste of the American public.
What makes this even more ridiculous is that these NDEs actually contradict the Bible; if they were true, they’d disprove Christianity. After all, Jesus said in one of the gospels that he would resurrect everyone and send them to their final destinations on Judgment Day. Nothing at all about disembodied spirits rising from their bodies and going directly to heaven right after death. That flies completely in the face of any visions anyone has of dead relatives in heaven. So either Burpo, etc. are wrong or the Bible is, or they all are (I’ll go with the last one).
That is correct. I just found out recently.
Everyone is just dead, until then.
Oddly enough, Dr. Alexander, who is Jewish, didn’t meet Jesus. That doesn’t at all square with Colton Burpo’s experience, or with Colton’s “revelation” that only people who love Jesus go to heaven. Gosh, how could these two true stories be so inconsistent? I guess it’s just one of those mysteries that are the essence of religion.
Unfortunately, this tawdry film will (by proxy) improve the resale value on Kirk Cameron’s home via credulity-based appreciation standards. Heaven is for sale.
Sean,
Randall Wallace WROTE Braveheart but it was DIRECTED by Mel Gibson.
Hannity’s most disturbing interview remains his allowing George Zimmerman to claim it was “the will of God” that he shot Trayvon Martin.
Aren’t there any Sophisticated Theologians who just say these beliefs are simply false and leave it at that??