78 thoughts on “Why is Chopra ageing?”

  3. Hahaha, that’s superb! How long before he starts pretending to vomit golden chicken eggs of divinity like Sai Baba? I wonder.

  5. And what’s with the glasses? If his consciousness creates reality, couldn’t he have created one that was in focus?

      1. I would not object to have a look at Deepak’s eyes, but I suspect his problems are located more posteriorly, in his brain.

  6. There is a big difference between thinking correctly and correct thinking. He needs to use the third kind (the eye of the quantum).

  8. Whiter hair and less of it, advancing presbyopia, paunchiness and loose-fitting skin? I meant to do that! He said “learning to direct” ageing, not “changing the direction” of it.

    We’re all still circling the drain, but “Self power unfolds into formless silence” saith the Choprabot.

  11. You forgot to account for his conscious intention of the up quark to internalize the singularity thus inhibiting the quantum effects of time. 😉

    1. Quantum up-quark connects us to the source of everything, the eternal field of consciousness. Only there, will you find youth, harmony, and the undisturbed contentment of bliss.
      That will be $39.95 please. We take all credit cards.

  12. I like the contrast between Chopra’s seemingly profound statement and the blunt commentary below it.

    1. Cannot metabolize time?

      If you are time intolerant, try timeade,the drink that puts you in touch with your inner chronosynclastic infundibulum, and it tastes good too.

  13. Looks like he’s wearing the same close since 1985. Maybe he looks older but doesn’t sweat, and doesn’t need to deal with doing laundry.

  14. But he is going to live forever, just not in way that any of us can measure. His super-quantum-god gives him this power.

  15. I can already hear Chopra calling everyone a bully. I even hear his voice in my head. Maybe Chopra is communicating with me now.

    1. That’s a result of quantum conciousness. Conciousness is nonlocal and a field, a superposition of possibilities. Including, but not limited to, Chopra’s voice.

    2. Wait, I think I just felt an itch near my right ear. I think Chopra want’s me to hear something…gotta go.

      1. Oh no! That’s what that has been these past few months. How do I stop it? Is it something to do with my spin?

        1. As far as I know, there is no known cure. But daily doses of the writings of Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, and Jerry Coyne have been found to effectively mitigate the symptoms.

  16. Since he is in complete control, he must have wanted to look like this. I was going to not laugh but with no free will, I’m on the floor.

  17. I love watching Deepak getting called out on his BS, and the photos do show that Deepak ages, but “sucked at it”? Even I have to admit Deepak looks amazing, er, scratch that, he looks remarkable for **67** years old – to which I credit genetics, not quantum consciousness.

      2. But, wealthy or not, Deepak really does look good for his age, better I’d think than many other rich people, possibly most, of the same age.

  18. It’s only pictures of Deepak that age to reflect his soul-corrupting sins against science. Owing to his Faustian deal with woo, the man himself never ages.

    2. Deepak looks pretty good for his age – he must have a Picture of Aubrey de Grey locked in a room somewhere.

        1. Errr, I was making an (unsuccessful, obviously) joke about the author of “Ending Aging” and editor of “Rejuvenation Research.”

      2. And so our story climaxes with a young, dark-haired man entering that room, knife in hand — and with the police responding to the plaintive cry that ensues, to find an ancient Deepak, identifiable only by the bling of his Sir-Elton-style spectacles, the knife plunged into his heart, lying before a picture of the youthful Chopran visage. The End.

        (FWIW, I think The Big O spelt his title character’s last name Yank-style, with an “a”, rather than an “e” like the Earl of tea.)

  22. If you are time intolerant, try timeade,the drink that puts you in touch with your inner chronosynclastic infundibulum, and it tastes good too.

    1. “Oh, ya gotta help me doctor . . . I think my chronosynclastic infundibulum is acting up. I may even be suffering from a diverticulated frammiss.”

      I’m totally gonna try that on my PCP next office visit.

  25. We already went through this. His guru used to say that gneuine immortality (if it be possible) would be related to teh ability to float consistently during the practice of the TM-SIdhis’ Yogic Flying technique.

    Chopra’s never claimed that.

    As for how much he’s aged? He’s aged more than I would have expected, but he’s been experimenting with non-TM for 20+ years now, and mindfulness and other practices, while they have some minor anti-aging effect, aren’t really all that healthy for you.

    1. Exaccerly. He only said you could direct your whatever, he didn’t say he wanted to. He could if he wanted to, but he’s beyond the superficial. His desires are in the quantum super realm of ageless divine unity.

  27. “There but for fortune…may go you or I”,we do not get to choose our genes, parental units, our geographical location, all we can choose, is with in the paramitars of our biology is how to behave in our society (maybe)?
    I would really like to believe we have some type of control but, the longer I observe/learn the less I am inclined to believe. Heck and gosh darn I do miss the fairies at the bottom of the garden, that is until I look up at the night sky and I am in wonder at how indifferent the universe is in regards to me.

  28. “Can’t he remain immortal—or at least not age—by just thinking correctly about the issue?”

    I tried that. When I hit 30 I decided to stop counting because I still ‘felt like 30’ inside. If anyone asked my age I said “Thirty” with a grin.

    I finally gave that up when it became 100% chronologically inaccurate, and none too physically credible either. Now if anyone asks my age I say “bloody geriatric”. 🙁

  30. Will this be the next title to come off the Chopra Random Book Generator?

    Methinks the photos show the accumulation of metabolic waste products of time – such as grey hair, wrinkles & crinkles. His Immortal Self remains constant but invisible?!

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