Antievolution music: did Charlie make a monkey out of you?

January 9, 2013 • 3:41 am

Reader Atom sent me this catchy Christian anti-evolution video, “Did Charlie make a monkey out of you?”, with the song by Tom Walk and Russel Alan Pratt. This is the Kool-Aid that our Christian friends imbibe.

I have to say that it’s a bouncy tune, even if the only substantive argument is that there arent’ enough missing links, and there’s an implicit threat of damnation if you adhere to Darwin.

I suppose Alain de Botton would say that we need to write more evolution songs.

 

57 thoughts on “Antievolution music: did Charlie make a monkey out of you?”

    1. Cuttlefish at FTB has some good ones. He doesn’t usually provide the music, but the rhymes and rhythms often fit well-known tunes.

    2. They Might Be Giants in their Here Comes Science CD have several pro-evolution songs.

      Science is Real
      “Science is Real,
      From the Big Bang to DNA
      Science is real
      from evolution to the Milky Way…”

      or
      My Brother the Ape
      “But I’ll admit that I look more like a chimp
      Than I look like my cousin the shrimp
      Or my distant kin lichens or the snowy egret or the moss”

      or my favorite on the CD
      I am a paleontologist

      Its like pieces of a puzzle
      That I love to try and solve
      It’s so fun to think about
      How a species has evolved

      Also, the kid’s band Lunch Money just put out a song “To be a fossil”, but the lyric’s aren’t online yet and the only line I can remember is “Come and find me Mary Leakey…”

  4. The belief that a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father (by magically raping a thirteen year old Jewish girl named Mary) can make you live forever if you symbolically drink his blood, eat his flesh, and telepathically tell him that you accept him as your master so he will remove a magical curse from your invisible soul because a woman made from a man’s rib was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.

    The belief in an invisible man in the sky, that exists simultaneously in all times and places, creates universes with a word (but needs a nap at the end of the week’s work), loves every single one of us, but destroys cities, civilizations, and entire populations, and throws billions into fires for eternity, for behaving EXACTLY the way he made us to do (and knew we would beforehand), then a horse with a horn on it’s head seems perfectly reasonable.

    The belief that you could run a Zoo of all the “kinds” (whatever that is), on a boat with minimal ventilation & light in Force 12 conditions, with just 8 unqualified people while today a zoo, on dry land, with all the technology that we have at hand, and with a fraction of the “Kinds” to look after, requires hundreds of specialist employees.

    The belief that the fossil sequence & geology supports a Global Flood.

    There’s got be a song, nay a musical, in there somewhere.

    2. Even crazier – at least for CATholics (I just noticed that for Jerry :)) – the eating of the flesh and blood is not symbolic. It is eating the actual flesh and blood. They call it transsubstantiation.

  5. Yea, funny, but sad at the same time. Those kids are brainwashed from childhood, they instruct them with funny and joyful music which all kids love (what kid would refuse to jump and participate on such a funny video?), but teach them a bullshit and false statements, that unfortunately kids would consider facts when they are grown up, and refuse the real scientific facts because of their lovely childhood experience as if these facts are against their childhood love/joy/fun.

    How pathetic is that?

  6. my band wrote an evolution song but packaged it as more of a satire of the religious right. i posted it on a few atheist facebook pages and was promptly called a ‘retard’ by one atheist! as an atheist myself and supporter of evolution and the scientific method it was very disheartening! maybe it needed to be more satirical!
    but in response to “we need to write more evolution songs” here is our effort:

    http://youtu.be/we-v8acbXpY

      1. thanks for the kind words.

        and, marella, you are spot on! what sort of heaven is it if you can’t bloody shop? are there places to buy alcohol?
        these are very important questions that need answering.

        sash

  8. I give you Words Such As Burn’s “Fallacy 1: Argument From Ignorance”:

    Oh my, what a beautiful sky

    Witnessed with a marvelously complex eye

    Comprehended by an enigmatic mind

    To those who can’t conceive that these wonders were not designed, well…

    

Don’t limit yourself

    By your own imagination.
    
You don’t have to sink
    
Into a sea of divine creation.

    

Oh hey, what did Ockham say?
    
The old boy had it bad for Ms. Parsimony
    
He took her home, but she would not behave

    She gave him the knife; it was a very close shave

    

Don’t limit yourself

    By your own imagination

    You don’t have to know

    Before you have the information

    /@

    PS. Buying the EP (or the single “Flow”) supports the Secular Student Alliance.

  9. Roy Zimmerman wrote a (great) parody of that:

    Creation Science 101
    youtube.com/watch?v=uIwiPsgRrOs

  10. Gotta give them credit- that is the only Christian song I have seen that shows a sense of humor! I enjoyed it in spite of myself.

  11. Something original like the element song would be cool. The best I know of is from the BBC Horrible Histories show – youtube.com/watch?v=Pt2gHpqfZNA – sung to David Bowie’s Changes. And this sweet song – youtube.com/watch?v=UuZTqLW_MN4

    That creationism song appeared to be a musical version of this Jack Chick comic http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0055/0055_01.asp Be prepared before you read any of his work, it’s so wrong it goes beyond humour into something quite dark, like that song.

  12. I think I need some Melodysheep and some synthesised David Attenborough to get that song out of my head. youtube.com/watch?v=wxDOpAM2FrQ

  13. I think we really DO have a much better pro Darwinian tune – the “Rationalist Anthem” by Baba Brinkman, and to top it off it’s far more trendy, being a rap number

  14. If Santorum stands again he’s got a catchy tune to go along with his anti education rhetoric.

    1. But he may have been thinking of something more accommodating than “Darwin Ate Your Jesus Fish”

      youtube.com/watch?v=Kf5wuFMsKe0

  17. Check out the album “Natural Selections” by Mark Graham. OOP but available online if you look for it. Old-time/folk style acoustic music, very well done and funny. Science-friendly and atheist-friendly but be warned, it’s not always politically correct.

  19. I think that most ‘monkeys’ use their brain better then those ‘apes’ like Walk, Pratt and their friends.

  24. Ugh! I listened to this earlier today and now I keep hearing this tune in my head, “…made a monkey out of youuuu…” Make it stop!

  26. The third substantive-ish argument comes at the end: Darwin recanted on his deathbed. It’s true! Lady Hope said so, and she was a Christian.

  27. From the uploaders Youtube channel page it’s clear he’s into innuendo…

    About OnKneesforJesus4:-

    My life is all about getting on my knees and faithfully servicing Jesus until He comes.

    Please send me video links from your local news that shows Christians doing loving things.

    I think this guy is probably a British satirist making fun [& a small profit] at the expense of both “sides” ~ only his Christian subscribers aren’t getting it

    Anyway, look at his onkneesforjesus blogspot & decide for yourselves

    1. My life is all about getting on my knees and faithfully servicing Jesus until He comes.

      This guy has to be trolling Christians. No way does a line like that get used by accident.

  28. I’m not going to watch the clip, life’s to short for 3 minutes of creationism (Or is it cretinism?) I’ll watch some porn instead, as it’s much more informative.
    However I saw a very good illustration of the “missing link” argument on Futurama the other day:

  29. I was in the middle of reading one of your wonderful articles and seeing your post motivated me to make you a song. here’s part of the lyrics 🙂 http://parsaphotography.wordpress.com/2013/01/10/for-dr-coyne/

    I said, Dr. Coyne, what’s evolution?
    He said, it’s based on Darwin’s set of conclusions.
    It’s now a theory, with much attestation,
    actuated by natural selection and gene mutations.
    It’s as a clear as the gravitational manifestation!

    He said, but it’s a religious intrusion,
    and I need seclusion from the god revolution!
    Pseudoscience is no science!
    It’s just an interpretation with no factual conclusion!
    It’s exasperation, not a revelation!
    But boy, what an imagination!

    -Kimia

  30. Lady Hope was just following Eusebius’ advice to lie for Yeshua. And Duane Gish loves to lie for morality in thinking that should students learn about evolution, they’d act badly, but his own lies indirectly belie that!
    I had to redo my blogs at wordpress. com. LamberthG @ Twitter promotes them and my blogspots,tumblrs and posterouses.com.
    I relish retirement so I can do my work of helping people overcoming their superstition on the internet.

  34. growing up in a pentecostal family, and being a pastor’s son, I have to admit, I used to sing this with great vigour and glee during the church camps we had in Dubai, and even sing it to my friends at school. Almost a decade later, as an atheist, I look back with amusement. Oh the days of ignorance!

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