It’s from a Facebook page. I’m not offering any prizes here, but the winner will get hearty congratulations from moi.
Caption this photo
October 21, 2011 • 11:06 am
Why Evolution is True is a blog written by Jerry Coyne, centered on evolution and biology but also dealing with diverse topics like politics, culture, and cats.
“What do you mean there is ‘No Dog’?”
U haz cat nature?
What d’ya see? Nothing Buddha pussycat.
I can haz lite mint?
b&
Why is there no food in the bowl?
One of those ‘Noble Truths’ better involve me getting fed.
I don’t care if you’re one with nothingness! Where’s my dinner??
Buddha blinked first…
cat: rub my belly
What is the sound of one paw crushing prey?
Which one of us is god?
“Meditation? I can achieve nirvana with just a little catnip.”
Om your ass
Your move asshole.
Well, you were right about the being reincarnated as an animal thing.
What is the sound of one cat napping?
“Ossifer, I’d like to report a cat napping in progress.”
b&
Can has koan of tuna?
+1
Englightenment would be nice anytime. I can’t exactly rub your belly without committing suffering.
You have 10 seconds to feed me or I start worshiping another ceiling cat.
I will cut you like warm butter. Now, scratch my head.
Both: “Rub my belly!”
I hate to complain but wud it have killed ya to bring me back as a more fearsome kitteh?
Cat: “I rly wants drink from ur lap but I doan wants dis to be awkward.”
Wait…..are you telling me I gotta do this 9 times over? I assume that after 4 it’ll start to get a lil bit tedious no?
Ok I’m on 6 going on 7 and I hate to complain but can I skip the last 2?
Hey you might want to double check your algorithm. This body might have a tiny glitch in its for loop statement.
If I rubs yer belly, does I get treats?
What about Franny and Zooey. Have you read that? You’re mentioned in it.
So, do I get to meet Ceiling Cat before or after I reach a state of cosmic consciousness?
Why the look of smug satisfaction Buddha? You’re not me.
I knew you once.
Everyone else bows to me. Why don’t you?
And they say I came from a fish?
** beterz tHan a thousand wordz ~ one meow dat bringz teh tuna
** can ur Kharma leash teh dogma ??
** Teh Buddist Templetonz prize ~ imz spritchewl – can i winz teh fish ??
Reminds me of a favorite joke of mine when I was growing up…”Your karma ran over my dogma while he was chasing a stigma.”
b&
I was going to go with karma = car, but I wasn’t sure if the UK “car” is well understood in teh states to mean automobile
Oh. You must mean a horseless carriage. I get it now.
Actually, “car” is by far the more common term. “Automobile” is only used formally, and “auto” is only common preceding “industry” or “worker.” An auto worker might get in the car to drive to work to write a paper on the decline of the automobile industry in the American midwest.
Cheers,
b&
You have shattered my illusions! One of my ambitions was to travel in an auto-mobile & have a sheriff say “Step away from the vee-hickle!”
🙂
LOL ~ Me too, but avoid white water rafting in banjo playin’ parts of that most diverse nation
Oh — well, you can probably still do that. Petty bureaucrats are everywhere inordinately fond of their own private languages.
Of course, long before the sheriff demanded to inspect your car’s cavities, the TSA would have demanded to inspect your body’s, so I’m not sure that’s an ambition you really want to keep….
b&
🙁
A STARIN CONTEST, U SAY? I HOPE U R PREPARD 2… WHOA! IZ DAT A CRICKET?
“I can has moral value. You can haz none.”
“haz” – has.
Does a dog have Buddha-nature?
“Noez! I tole yoo I wanted BUTTAH!”
Master, I am ready for the secret of the Eternal Can Opener . . .
Close, the cat says, but put more “rrr” in it.
Good. Now, cross your legs thusly and fold your paws…
Small world, I like to sit on my tail and stare vacantly ahead all day too!
“Sit here. Do nothing. Desire nothing but to sit here and do nothing. I can handle that.”
Com on Buda, ur maus waz liek toetaly vegetarian.
“No Grasshopper. Sleep first, THEN eat.”
“Make me one with everything”.
Sorry Buddy, we were gods 2500 years before you and as you can see, we’re still around.
You haz not moved in a week, you must teach me the secret to true laziness.
I can’t believe it’s not Buddha!
Middle way? Forget it. The only way is my way.
My colleagues and I have successfully caused Professor Coyne to waste yet another hour looking at cat pics. I await further instructions, oh Enlightened One.
+1
But which is speaking?
Cat: Where do you get your hair done?
Lotus position? Easy. Can you do Downward-Facing Cat?
Cat: When you’ve finished you can lick your own arse!
[Beg pardon to those of a sensitive nature!]
Sorry mate, I only do cat licks.
“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.”
That was the Buddha talking, by the way. (Not the cat.) Lol.
Oh, I thought you said purrvana.
** NomzCat sez: “teh Wheel of Dharma ~ canz i keep teh hamster?”
** MantraCat sez: “Om kibble mani kibble padme kibble hum kibble Omz”
** MindfulCat sez: “Awakening? i goes nap now”
** MantraCat II sez: “nOmmmz nOmmmz nOmmmz nOmmmz”
+1
NOM mani padme NOM.
Cats meditate too. We just call it sleeping.
The Buddha takes a lesson in the art of stillness.
…while the cat takes a lesson in the art of silliness.
b&
Cat: What do those humans see in all this bullshit?
OK, what can you do, Bud, that I can’t do?
“In my last life, I was a circus freak.”
“Inner peace is easy. Can you catch birds in your bare hands?”
So, explain to me again how you do that with your back legs
Cat: “Yes, after I died as Buddha, I was reincarnated as a cat.”
Cat: Achieve nirvana? Me? How?
Buddha: Sorry, I’m a dog person. Now fuck off.
I just believe in several fewer lives than you do. When you understand why you dismiss my nine lives, you will understand why I dismiss your concept of rebirth.
“Stare deep into my eyes and you’ll levitate”
U has a bug on ur noze
“What has da nature of Fancy Feast.”
Hey Bud, don’t make it bad
Take a fat cat and make him fatter
Remember to let him onto your lard
Then you can start to make him fatter
Geesh… two of mine were taken! So, I’ll just say:
Buddha meets Cuddha
Lame, I know…..
Cat: “Are you *sure* you’re not Jewish?”
** TheologCat sez: “so ceiling cat tellz me ur a metapaw”
** ZenCat sez: “all iz change ~ ‘cept littr box”
** QuantumCat sez: “..an if thers ‘Erwin’ on teh box… run!”
Cat : You better spill the beans. I can keep doing this the whole day.
Hey! sphincter boy – miracle my arse. I’ve come armed with the power of reason and a superior olfactory system to tell all what makes that water bubble.
Cat to Bhudda: ‘Huh! You call THAT inscrutability!’
“Mmmmmm…whazzat saying again? If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him?”
Ceiling cat is watching you achieve enlightenment.
…SO DAT WUZ MAH 5TH LIFE. UR TURN!
Cat: Do you feel lucky punk? Well DO YA?
And I’m not kidding.
http://www.wired.com/dangerroom/2011/10/army-vs-puppies
Are deployed troops not vaccinated against rabies?
If the Buddha blocks you way on the road to enlightenment, stare at him until he feeds you.
“If the mountain cat won’t come to Buddha, Buddha will have to go to the mountain cat.”
“No, Enfeebled One, this _is already_ a purrfect world. Now, bring me tuna!”
“I am cute, you are fat. See the difference?”
LOL. Good one.
Cat-lap, Bud?
“I got yer inner peace right here!”
Turtles? Really? All the way down?
An Egyptian deity ponders the tendency of humans to make gods in their own image.
OMG its justin timberlake!
So the Dalai Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks, “Can you make me one with everything?”.
Get it? No, see, it’s a joke.
You were supposed to make me look skinny!
So, we meet again…
Son, repeat after me. The dog is the root of all evil.
Doez dis “enlitenmint” come with fries?
OK. Who’s gonna rub whose belly?
Enough with the clapping! get that one hand petting!
Teh Analeezt Kitteh hypnoutez ur Budha, “Sweepiy Sweepey…Naou trie to remumbr, lieke wer u puted yoaur cheezburger….”
Kitty is just seeking self-realization and trascendence (from the Unbearable Lightness of Being a Cat).
“Humans believe this guy is enlightened? But he’s not even a cat!”
TOP: “Oh Hai Budda”
BOTTOM: ” I can haz starez 2
Since when was Budweiser better than Kathmandu? You’re dreaming. AND my dad can beat your dad.
You’re sitting in my spot
Mee-OMMMM.
I’ve seen this one around…can’t take credit for it of course, but the caption I’ve seen is “Whaddya mean, BE the cheezburger??”
And the winner of the caption contest (without a prize) is….. ?