Caturday felid trifecta: Photos of cats on nip; Puffy the Hypnotist Cat; Londoners drank gin from a cat’s paw

Woman’s World features a piece on “The best cats on catnip photos that we’ve ever seen.” Here’s a few of the good ones with the site’s captions:

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In the mid 1940s, a cream-colored Persian cat named Puffy became quite popular, for he was said to hypnotize people with his unblinking stare.  This is from the Cinncinnati Enquirer on April 9, 1945:

Puffy, a cat that hypnotizes people, was named honorary President of the American Feline Society, Inc., today today and officially dubbed “King of All Cats.”

Citing the cream-colored Persian for devoting his “phenomenal psychic powers” to War Bond sales and entertaining wounded veterans, Robert Lothar Kendell, the society’s President, declared: “We truly believe you to be the greatest living feline, with powers never before possessed by a cat or, so far as we can learn, by any living creature other than a human being.”

Puffy, credited with putting more than 300 persons into a hypnotic trance with his huge, unblinking eyes, was all puffed up over the honor, reported his owner-assistant, Arthur Newman, “He’s autographing pictures with his paw print like crazy,” said Newman.

It was one night last fall that Puffy, then a kitten, first demonstrated his powers. “He was sitting on the end of a night club bar,” Newman recalls, his voice becoming hushed, “and a couple of girls came up to pet him. I didn’t pay much attention until one of the girls nudged me and whispered, “Look at my friend!’

“Well, sir, that girl was simply out on her feet. It wasn’t from drinking, either. I’m something of a hypnotist myself and I quickly realized that she was in a real hypnotic trance, brought on by Puffy’s staring into her eyes.”

Newman, who had bought Puffy in a pet shop for purposes of demonstrating that people should relax like cats, immediately started training him to stare even more fixedly, with such success that Puffy now can stare Newman down any time.

Thousands of servicemen in hospitals and canteens have seen Puffy perform. He stares into a subject’s eyes while Newman slowly counts out loud. In less than 10 seconds the subject closes his eyes, goes rigid or relaxed, and has to be awakened by Newman.

Skeptics to the contrary, Newman insists it’s Puffy and not himself that does the hypnotizing. “If that cat could only talk,” he says, “I’d quit working and just manage Puffy.”

People always feel better–headaches gone, and the like–after being hypnotized by Puffy, Newman says, because they have become relaxed in spite of themselves. Several have taken the pledge after watching Puffy do his act in a bar.

Besides hypnotizing people, Puffy entertained wounded WWII veterans and sold war bonds! What a great cat! Here he is putting a woman to sleep. Look at that stare!

Here’s Puffy selling war bonds!

For his powers and services, Puffy was named King of All Cats:

My friend Miranda, who did much of the Puffy research, had this reaction:

Haha omg that is one of the best and funniest kitty things I’ve ever seen. Every bit of it is hilarious.

I mean, being a *hypnotist cat* is awesome enough, but Puffy doesn’t stop there. Oh no, hypnotic abilities are only the tip of Puffy’s glory:

1) He was “officially dubbed ‘King of All Cats’” (ALL CATS!!) *and* “the greatest living feline”. GREATEST CAT ALIVE!

2) He was patriotic as fuck and thoughtful too: he devoted “his ‘phenomenal psychic powers’ to War Bond sales and entertaining wounded veterans”. I mean, he basically hypnotized American humans into *funding the war*. I mean, hell, Puffy is, for all intents and purposes, responsible for the Allies’ victory in WWII. And he entertained wounded veterans, too. Basically, Puffy’s psychic hypnotic powers saved America. Fucking badass mofo. KING OF ALL CATS!

3) Puffy got all sorts of hot chick action, both feline and human. He was a pimp. All he had to do was look at hot chicks and they became his love slaves. He was clearly a Cat Sex God. I mean!! →

“It was one night last fall that Puffy, then a kitten, first demonstrated his powers. “He was sitting on the end of a night club bar,” Newman recalls, his voice becoming hushed, “and a couple of girls came up to pet him. I didn’t pay much attention until one of the girls nudged me and whispered, “Look at my friend!’

“Well, sir, that girl was simply out on her feet. It wasn’t from drinking, either. I’m something of a hypnotist myself and I quickly realized that she was in a real hypnotic trance, brought on by Puffy’s staring into her eyes.” “

4) And as if all that weren’t enough to prove he was indeed the God of All Cats, Puffy’s hypnotic stare also HEALED THE SICK. FUCK, HE WAS JESUS!  →

“People always feel better–headaches gone, and the like–after being hypnotized by Puffy, Newman says, because they have become relaxed in spite of themselves”

Omg Puffy haha this is the best thing ever! (^‿^)

I think Puffy glared at Dan Arel!

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Finally, from Londonist we learn of the world’s first vending machine, which dispensed illegal gin through a cat’s paw in London:

“The tale goes that a fairly devious chap called Captain Dudley Bradstreet, an illicit gin peddler, also had a sideline as an agent for the government informing on illegal gin producers. The nature of his business coupled with the fact that he was probably not the most well-liked man necessitated that he maintained a degree of anonymity, and he came up with an ingenious way of doing this.

“In his marvellously titled book, The Life and Uncommon Adventures of Captain Dudley Bradstreet, he explains how, when at a particularly low ebb, he spent his last £13 at the Langdale’s Distillery in Holborn, whom it was said produced the finest gin in London at the time; what he did next assured him a footnote in gins history:

I . . . purchased in Moorfields the sign of a cat and had it nailed to a street window. I then caused a leaden pipe, the small end out about an inch, to be placed under the paw of the cat, the end that was within had a funnel to it … When the liquor was properly disposed, I got a person to inform a few of the mob that gin would be sold by the cat at my window next day, provided they put money in his mouth . . . at last I heard the chink of money and a comfortable voice say, ‘Puss, give me two pennyworth of gin!’ I instantly put my mouth to the tube and bid them receive it from the pipe under her paw.

“Bradstreet had unwittingly created one of the earliest vending machines – for the distribution of illegal gin. Ingenious. An innovation that was soon copied across the capital. People would stand outside houses, call ‘puss’ and when the voice within said ‘mew’ they would know that they could buy bootleg gin inside. Very soon Old Tom became an affectionate nickname for gin.”

h/t: Tom, Will